For those of you who have ever watched a boxing match, you’ve probably noticed the coaches. They walk out closely trailing or alongside the boxer during the grand entrance. When the boxer jumps in the ring before the match, the coach jumps in the ring with him, throws up the stool, and they talk about strategies. The coach also provides a big pep talk.
When the boxing match starts, though, where is the coach? He jumps out of the ring and watches from the sidelines. He observes and maybe yells a thing or two about how to change things up. And also yells motivational things like “get up” and “you got ‘em”.
BUT THE COACH ISN’T IN THE RING.
Between rounds, the coach throws the stool back into the ring and comes in close for another strategy meeting and pep talk. As battered and bruised as the boxer might be, the coach has to take a back seat during the match.
What does the coach provide if he isn’t in the ring? What can he do if he’s just on the sidelines observing only giving advice between rounds?
The coach provides insight based on observation and experience. He provides a pep talk intended to motivate the boxer. The most impactful thing that the coach does, though, is he believes in the boxer. He believes that he can stay the course, get up when he’s down, persevere when things get tough.
And that’s what your child needs. They don’t need you in the ring.
They simply need you in their corner. They need to know that you’ll be there for them in between the rounds. They need to know that they can rely on you for advice and guidance. And they need to know that you believe THEY can handle the situation at hand.
When you jump in the ring for them, you essentially sideline them. You take away the opportunity for them to learn and grow. And you take away the belief that they can handle it.
So parents, as much as you might want to jump in the ring and fix it and protect them from the punches and knock outs, all your child really needs and wants is for you to pull up the stool and give them the pep talk, support, and belief they need.
Unlike boxing, though, there are more than 12 rounds. Hang in there parents…
You got this!
With Heart, Coach Sheri
P.S. Join our Facebook group at http://facebook.com/groups/theparentinglab for more info and support
